We wait.


We knew it would happen..mainly because it ALWAYS happens with this home build.
The closing date was pushed once again to the end of this month...the same week we said that the only way we would build the new house was with the guarantee that we would be in it no later than the start of school.

Yep not happening.  Try moving the first week of school.  
In the words of one of my best friends "Are you shitting me?!!!!"  
I am afraid I am not.  Apparently they totally skipped over the part where this new house is four months late not 1 week.
Selective memory.  Did I mention it isn't even coming with a garage door.
You have to laugh...the alternative is cry...I choose laugh and a bonding day with my hubby one day soon watching YouTube videos on how to install a new garage door opener.
But THAT is a blog post for another day sweet friends.

So we did the only thing we could because we literally are on our own in this craziness.
Nothing.  Yep...nothing.
They don't care and well it's not worth our stress and minutes out of our life to spend it bitter and spiteful.  
If they want to sell that new house to us (which pretty sure is still the plan) they best just finish the dang thing.  
Which I think at the end of the day is but a few weeks off.  Fingers crossed and prayers said.

That leaves us with putting the focus on trying to sell our current home at just about the worst time of year.  (yeah us!)
Remember that part about we didn't want to move after school had started?  Well that would be the exact reasons now is the wrong time to try and sell our old house.
We aren't the only folks in the world who think this way.
We have had a few showings and another open house today and showing this evening. 
The truth is I am tired.  Like I am 10 months pregnant kidnof tired.
If there are no bites over the next few days this house is going to end up with 3 signs slapped in that yard.
First sign..."FOR SALE"
Second sign... "RENT TO OWN"
Third sign... "FOR RENT"

Who ever qualifies first wins!  And can move in the last week of August...before the public schools start if they want.
I am just a gal who needs one less thing to think about ;-)
Know any great realtors in town who do rental management?  You just send their name my way...lol!  I am interviewing a few this week.

Since I am also the gal who lives most days in the "glass half full" side of life this is the part where I tell you all the positive things!  Life is too short to live in the negative.  I refuse to dim the light. 
My life is indeed very good.  If the stress of adulting and this B.S. is the worst I have to contend with then I am doing pretty darn good.  I have had days.
Truly bad days.
I know a bad day when I see one....heck I know a bad year when I see one.
We are fine.  Just stressed. 

I should probably start with the loss of my craft space and studio room....(I am clearly still mourning the temporary loss)
I am a creative...I create.  Not just one thing.  All the things.
I sew, crochet, make jewelry, paper crafts, scrapbook, attempt to paint (I suck), photograph all the things and I write.
Not going to claim I do them all well but I do them.  I enjoy the hell out of them!  
With the bulk of them all living in the storage unit currently I have been left with my computer and my camera.
This forced "creative fast" has taught me something about myself.  
I create because I have too.  It's my escape from reality.  My sanity.
Some people take medication I take paper and scissors.

My need to escape my everyday is something that I have had since childhood.  I learned early on that I am a runner.   Not the healthy kindof of runner.  No no no...more like the first sign of trouble I am out the door kindof runner.
There really isn't a sugar coated way to put it....my childhood was 3 parts hell and 2 parts pure adventure from all of my running from the crazytown I called "home".
Living on a farm with only the cows, a creek and a cemetery to pass my time I had two choices when faced with the turmoil within our actual house.  Run out the door or hang out within those walls and let that darkness consume me too.
I ran.
And ran...and really never stopped running until Daryl fully caught me.  Poor boy had his hands full but he has always been my anchor.  The one thing that firmly plants my feet to this earth.  Without him I would surly have become a gypsy and would have had a very different (not half as amazing) life.

All those days spent running away from reality were typically spent rambling around cow pastures, fishing in the creek and laying flowers on the graves in the cemetery (it was a VERY old cemetery hidden in the woods).  I can still smell the heavy english rose blooms that climbed the fence around the cemetery if I close my eyes...and the peonies!  Oh how that place had the best peonies!  I would spend hours watching the little sugar ants climb all over the peony blooms and I would pretend that the blooms couldn't open until the ants came.  Letting my imagination build worlds and stories that only I lived in.  Hours spent endlessly lost.  
There was so much magic in my wild childhood there.  

At the end of the years...(time served)
My imagination is what had saved me.  Of this I have never doubted a second.
Without my crazy ability to take my imagination "somewhere else" survival would have left me bitter, angry and probably a very broken adult.
This world has enough broken people...that wasn't my plan for myself.
I managed to grow a very fierce independent streak and pretty sure the stubborn side of me came with the package that is me.

What does all of that have to do with right now?  Right this minute in my creative life?
One word.  Escape.
Not from Daryl or my family or anything like that BUT I have had the come to Jesus meeting with myself that it is clear that imagination and creating are things that are just like breathing air for me.  
They keep me level and out of all the dark corners of adulting.
When you take them away from me I start to feel a bit like a caged animal.  Pacing and looking for all the exit doors.
I did what I knew I had to do...
Find a way to create without all my tools...
I started writing....and writing and writing...
Fantasy of all things😂  It makes me chuckle.  If you know me and my whole "homeschool mom for a decade...preschool teachers...wholesome mom" type of image I have somehow managed to get over the years (seriously not sure how that happened...cause I literally have a potty mouth and a strong predisposition for going against the norm.  Thinking I need to allow myself to curse more in my blogging?  I truly do enjoy a good curse word now and again.)

So why fantasy books? 
Because it is so far from any sort of reality.  It's all imagination and you guys....I have that in spades.  It has literally been so much stinking fun! 
I wanted the thing that took me as far away from "real" as possible. 

Jumping into an entirely other world...one that is totally created by the limits of my imagination.  It's pretty glorious.
I may never do a darn thing with it, or I may and just use a fake name to self publish.  Who knows.
What I have learned though?
We all have something that keeps us sane.  If we don't feed that part of ourselves that keeps us level we really will go nuts.
For me it's writing.  For Daryl it's the gym.  Haley it's drawing...etc....
We all have something and if we don't have something?  We got batty.
Like batshit.  ( I am living on the edge over here letting all my potty mouth come out to play🤣)

So back to it I go...sitting at the open house...opening Scrivner and jumping back into my fantasy world.
It's great there.  Nothing to worry about except made up monsters.  
Far less terrifying than adulting and reality.  
Just saying ;-)

No get out there and "find your thing".